Let me tell you about my weekend.
Friday night about 8:00pm Elroy, my baby informs me that I need to buy him boxers, because brief hurt his waist. I say ok and think nothing else of it. A good 15-20 minutes goes by and Elroy informs me that he can no longer wear the brief at all and wants to go commando (Pants with no underwear). I say ok he's ready for bed what hey
I roll into bed about 11:00 pm thinking, ok I have to work tomorrow, so I can sleep till about 7:30 am and still get to work on time.
Little did I know that I would get awaken in about 2 1/2 by Elroy informing me that his waist is really hurting him and he can’t sleep? Now this boy can sleep, nothing short of a half stick of dynamite can wake him up.
Anyway. I get a little nervous and think ok lets just run to the emergency room and have him checked out. I have nothing better to do at 1:30 in the morning. So I mosey on over to the ER about a five minute trip. All the while my baby is informing me that it is really hurting. The pain is just too much. I starting to get nervous but I don’t want him nervous so I try to keep calm. Telling him that we will be there soon and everything gonna be ok, famous last word
After about two hours of waiting the nurse come in and checks my baby out. His symptoms are kind of vague. He looks kind of pale, has sever pains, but no fever and no nausea, ooopps did I say no nausea, because as soon as the nurse left the room little Elroy showed mommy how far projectile vomiting can go.
Well this gets better service than just the stomach pains, because before I know it little Elroy is being rushed off to get his x-rays, and he proceeds to show the x-ray tech some of his projectile vomiting while he is there. The hospital staff then gives my baby something for his nausea, while we are waiting for his film to develop. Who wants to keep cleaning up that mess all over the ER?
So this very nice female doctor comes in to inform me they are concerned with his x-rays. I hear words like lower intestinal blockage, appendicitis Infection, a pediatric surgical consult, and transport to another hospital within the hour, and Morphine for the pain.
Ok, now before those phrases were spoken I was ok, it was after those words that I started to have a moment. I left the hospital to have a smoke, ok 3 but I needed time to pull my self together.
SH*T, SH*T, SH*T,
Those words kept running thru my mind. And thank you, Jesus For health insurance
So back to my ordeal. The transport ambulance comes and takes my baby away, can you say tailgate. I did not ride with my son. I didn’t want to be stranded at the hospital with out a vehicle. So I followed, very very closely.
We arrive at the 2nd hospital and the pediatric surgeon is in surgery so I have to wait for at least an hour. The pediatric doc on call comes in takes a look at my son, orders more x-ray, I guess the ones that were taken just a few hours ago weren’t any good. And I wait some more. An hour passes and the surgeon comes and takes a look at my son they poke and push his stomach ask how much it hurts. By now He starting to come out of his drug induced haze. Yes morphine works very well on Elroy. The doctor ask him how he’s doing how’s the pain, checks him over and then informs me that she doesn’t think he will need her service. But they would like to just watch him for a little while longer. Better to be safe then sorry. No sooner than the doctors leaves the room. Elroy lets rip one hell of a FART, YES A FART!!!!!!!!!
I have spent all night with no sleep, bad nerves and a few bouts of tears all because my baby has gas.
Did I mention that I have health insurance? Yes I am sure I did, and the only thing that pops into my mind at that moment was the fact that my co-pay is 100.00 for ER visits.
So I will be forking over 100.00 for a fart.
What a great weekend.
